Reflexive and Reciprocal in Vietnamese

Overview

Vietnamese expresses reflexive actions (doing something to oneself) with "tự" (self) and "tự mình" (by oneself), and reciprocal actions (doing something to each other) with "nhau" (each other) and "lẫn nhau" (one another). The phrase "với nhau" (together/with each other) is also extremely common in daily speech.

At the CEFR A2 level, these constructions appear in everyday expressions about self-reliance, mutual relationships, and group activities. "Tự mình làm" (do it yourself) and "giúp nhau" (help each other) are phrases heard constantly in Vietnamese life.

Unlike English, which uses distinct reflexive pronouns (myself, yourself, himself), Vietnamese uses the single word "tự" regardless of person or number, keeping the system simple and regular.

How It Works

Type	Word	Position	Example	Meaning
Reflexive	tự	before verb	Tự làm.	Do it oneself.
Reflexive emphatic	tự mình	before verb	Tự mình quyết định.	Decide by oneself.
Reciprocal	nhau	after verb	Yêu nhau.	Love each other.
Reciprocal emphatic	lẫn nhau	after verb	Giúp lẫn nhau.	Help one another.
Together	với nhau	after verb	Đi với nhau.	Go together.

Examples in Context

Vietnamese	English	Note
Tự mình làm đi.	Do it yourself.	reflexive + imperative
Họ yêu nhau.	They love each other.	reciprocal
Chúng tôi giúp lẫn nhau.	We help one another.	emphatic reciprocal
Đi với nhau nhé.	Let's go together.	together
Tự nấu ăn.	Cook for oneself.	reflexive
Nói chuyện với nhau.	Talk with each other.	reciprocal conversation
Tự học tiếng Việt.	Self-study Vietnamese.	reflexive
Hiểu nhau.	Understand each other.	reciprocal
Tự mình biết.	Know by oneself.	emphatic reflexive
Gặp nhau ở đâu?	Where shall we meet?	reciprocal meeting

Common Mistakes

Placing Nhau Before the Verb

• Wrong: Họ nhau yêu.
• Right: Họ yêu nhau.
• Why: "Nhau" follows the verb, not precedes it.

Confusing Tự and Tự Mình

• Wrong: Thinking they are completely different
• Right: "Tự" = self-action; "tự mình" = by oneself (emphatic, emphasizing independence)
• Why: "Tự làm" (do oneself) vs "tự mình làm" (do it by oneself / on one's own).

Using Reflexive Pronouns Like English

• Wrong: Tôi tự tôi làm (I myself I do)
• Right: Tôi tự làm or Tôi tự mình làm
• Why: Vietnamese does not repeat the pronoun with "tự."

Usage Notes

"Với nhau" (together/with each other) is one of the most common phrases in social Vietnamese: "ăn với nhau" (eat together), "đi chơi với nhau" (go out together), "sống với nhau" (live together). It carries warmth and communal feeling.

Practice Tips

• Use "nhau" with relationship verbs: "yêu nhau" (love each other), "hiểu nhau" (understand each other), "giúp nhau" (help each other). These are high-frequency phrases.
• Practice "tự + verb" for self-reliance statements: "tự học" (self-study), "tự nấu" (cook for oneself), "tự lái" (drive oneself).

Related Concepts

• Prerequisite: Personal Pronouns — reflexive/reciprocal extends the pronoun system